Why You're Watching K-Dramas At 47

 

Because wanting love again feels like your dirtiest secret

It’s 2am, and you’re going over visa forms and custody schedules in your head. Bills are piled on your desk. Your ex just sent another text about who's picking up the kids.

And then, out of nowhere, this thought sneaks in: What if I could fall in love again?

Almost immediately, the shame hits. Fast and hard.

The Fairy Tale You're Too Old For

You're a grown woman, a mother of two and a professional educator. You have stretch marks and a mortgage and parent-teacher conferences to attend.

Yet, last week, you found yourself watching that Korean drama your Year 10 students won't shut up about. The one with the perfect male lead who says all the right things and looks at the girl like she's the only person in the room. You told yourself you were just trying to understand what the kids are into these days. Professional development, right?

But the deep dark truth is, you were indulging in a dirty secret in the secret chambers of your heart. To imagine what it might be like to be wanted again. To be chosen. To have someone look at you such that it makes you blush like a little girl.

This little secret makes you feel pathetic. A 47-year-old woman, tears in her eyes, watching fictional romance because her real life feels so far from anything like that.

When Everyone Forgets You're Still Human

What makes it worse is, ever since the divorce, nobody's asking you about love anymore. Or maybe it’s too soon? After all, it’s only been two months 🫣

Your friends ask how the divorce is going. Your family asks if you're coping. Your colleagues ask if you need time off. Everyone wants to know if you're okay, if you're managing, if you're surviving.

But no one asks if you've met anyone. If you're dating. If you're ready to open your heart again.

It's like the world decided that part of your life is over, done and finished. “Alright, that’s it. You screwed up that one chance you have, and now you’re going to live the rest of your life as a haggard, single and lonely old woman.” Oh, that brutal inner critic!

It makes you feel wrong to even want it. Like you're being silly, childish and love-struck.

There’s No Shame In Wanting More

Ask your nasty inner critic to step aside and allow me to step in.

That desire to fall in love again is NOT a fairy tale, NOT naive, and there’s NOTHING to be embarrassed about.

It's actually the strongest sign that you're healing. In fact, I would encourage you to celebrate this and say to yourself, “Thank God I still have the ability to love!”

Did you know that research on post-divorce experiences indicates that while many women experience significant emotional growth and increased happiness, a segment of female divorcees experiences long-term disillusionment, emotional numbness, and a reduced desire for future romantic commitment? What a horrible way to live!

Wanting love means you still believe you're worthy of being chosen. Of being seen. Of building something good. It means your soul hasn't given up, even when life has been brutal.

I work with expat teachers who are in the thick of it. They're fighting to keep their work visas. Their homes. Their children's schools. The entire life they built as expats in Singapore. Every day feels like they're one wrong move away from losing everything.

And yet, somewhere in the middle of all that chaos, they start to feel it. That quiet hope. That secret wish for someone who will make them laugh again, hold their hand and see them as more than just a divorcee on borrowed time.

Moving from Survival to Something More

Keeping it together isn't just about getting through the divorce. It's about moving towards something more. It’s about believing that your story isn't over, that there's still space for joy, lightness and love.

Dreams are not distractions. They're what keeps you going.

If you're ready to stop hiding what you want and start building a life where love feels possible again, let's talk.